Light as feathers

All is still on Google Docs and a layer of dust gathers over the blank entries which were supposed to be filled. Desolation slowly infuses the stale and still air as two individuals who have covenanted to be of mutual encouragement abandoned the common space.

"Let's be intentional about our faith" said which such gusto now rings with deep hollowness. Its memory stands erect with accusing fingers and fiery eyes which bore deep into my conscience. You have abandoned your calling and capitulated to the demands of the world! You ran off with the prostitutes of work and other commitments that have distracted you and led you far away.

"Shaun, I have created a google document for us to encourage each other with a short reflection from our daily reading of Acts." This followed an agreement to read through the book of Acts together. We would meditatively reflect on a chapter each day without fail and write a short reflection. Two weeks was all it took before I began to procrastinate uploading my daily reflections. I started to lag behind by a day and soon, a whole week went by without a single entry. When the looming examinations raised the heat and demanded all my time, this became the sacrificial lamb which was offered to the idol of good grades. Shaun probably took his cue from me and began to slack off too. The fault is solely mine to bare as I have taken on the responsibility of discipling him and my own lack of discipline and hypocrisy have finally made themselves visible.

Now that my exams are over and I returned to view the document, guilt washes over me and I am once again reminded how light my words are. Commitments and promises so easily roll of my tongue, but they carry no weight. They are lighter than feathers--inconsequential and hence meaningless. I need to set my own affairs in order before I deign to tell Shaun how to order his. Let this be a sombre lesson to persist and be intentional.

Please keep me accountable on this issue